Worth It All (All #3) Read online

  WORTH IT ALL

  (All series, Book 3)

  A novel by

  Marie Wathen

  **Warning** Trigger scene possibility in this book for anyone who has suffered child abuse or molestation. Due to graphic language and detailed sex scenes, this book is not intended for anyone under the age of 18.

  WORTH IT ALL

  Copyright © 2014 Marie Wathen

  All Rights Reserved

  No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system without permission in writing from the owner. Excerpts for reviews–only when stated as such and quoted–are an exception.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Resemblance to actual person, living or dead, events or locales, are entirely coincidental.

  Editor: ERM Editing

  Published by Marie Wathen PO BOX 239 Vincent, AL 35178

  Cover Art Design & Formatting: Covert It! Designs

  Photographer: Love Photography

  Model: Kaitie Rickels

  Location: The Sterling Castle

  Dedication

  I dedicate this book to my daughters, Kayla and Kaitie, and son-in-laws, the Kyle’s. Life comes at you sometimes at speeds so fast and furious, you don’t know if you are upside down or lost in a wild labyrinth. When you find yourself in these moments, take a deep breath, and evaluate your situation and the people around you. Then let love be your guiding light through the chaos. Trust me, throughout your lifetime you will experience more than one heart-flip moment. There are no wrong answers, only poor decisions that lead to unwanted results. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:11-13. Do everything that matters, with all of your heart, because half-hearted endeavors don’t really matter. I thank God for each and every sweet and simple day, and I’m also grateful for the chaotic days that He has blessed me with that include you. I love you with all of my heart, Forover!

  Prologue

  Breesan (Five years ago…)

  “You’re a freak,” Miller spits, venom coursing through each hurtful word while she blocks the exit, successfully cornering me in the second floor girl’s bathroom. “Why on earth Anna wants to be your best friend is anyone’s guess. I mean, my God, you’re a jinx for crying out loud, and I don’t know why she wants to be around you, just waiting for a guillotine to drop and chop off her head.” A loud shrill from the bell echoes through the hallway, signaling the end of the school year, and I know that in just a few minutes every middle-schooler will abandon this place and we will be left alone.

  Miller Adams is the most popular and meanest girl in eighth grade, possibly in all of the school. We started sixth grade together, and since that first day, she has made me her target. Truthfully, I don’t understand why she chose me of all people. We have no common denominators and, as far as I know, I’ve never said one off word to her. Her family moved to Willow three years ago, so she’s not a native. She doesn’t know anything about me, other than what she’s heard through the rumor mill–nothing real. I guess she’s just the obligatory middle school mean-girl. Yay for me!

  “You don’t know anything.” Fed up with her crap, I step toward her, anger pulsing off of me like an overpressure blast, and I growl deep in my throat, “Anna isn’t my best friend! You need to leave her out of this…” I wave my hands in her direction, “...whatever it is you’re trying to do.”

  Posture stiffening and eyes widening, a result of the fury shockwave she senses from me, she gulps and then forces a smug smile. “What I’m doing is saying what everyone is thinking, but are too afraid to tell you.” Her tone is completely conceited, like she really believes that it’s her God-given right to tell me anything. “We all know about your parents.” My stomach lurches with the mention of my family, and the evil curve of her lips proves she’s pleased with my reaction, so she continues to torment me. “It’s no secret that you killed your mother. And your dad didn’t get deployed…” Her tiny foot slides forward a step until she realizes that she’s moving closer to me, and then she corrects it, retreating back two. With narrowed brown eyes, she gloats, “He left you. Your stepmother told my mom that he wasn’t planning on returning, either. Isn’t it convenient that he was captured? He probably just moved on and found another family, one with children that aren’t poisonous to be around.”

  “Shut up, Miller!” I wail so loudly my own ears ring. Crashing my hands over them, both to stop the vibrating and to shut her out, I push past her to get out of the stuffy bathroom.

  Flinching away from me with her palms held up, she screeches, “Don’t you ever touch me, I don’t want to die, too!” Just before the click of the closing heavy wooden door, I hear her suggest, “Why don’t you just move to Mars?”

  Mars…Mars…Mars, a child’s sweet voice sings in my head before everything goes black.

  “You will do as I tell you and everything will work out as I have planned,” A tall beautiful woman screams at Julia while standing over me, holding a shaky hand against my bruising cheek. “I have Brendt chained and drugged. And your sister is the only other person who has access to this room besides me.” She turns, looking at the woman beside her, and continues talking.

  The other woman’s face is familiar. She looks like Julia, but not as evil. Her golden eyes look softer, kinder. Is she really Julia’s sister? And who was that blonde man that stomped in before these women? He looks a little familiar, too, and he kissed my stepmother. That’s not a nice thing to do to my daddy.

  A straggled cackle erupts from the mean lady and then she divulges, “He may as well be on fucking Mars because no one will ever find him here.”

  Mars…Mars…Mars, I sing-song the word in my head, over and over, like I’m trying to remember it. She glares down at me with blazing hatred that makes me shiver with fear, and I quickly avert my eyes. “Your daddy will remain hidden here, until I’ve deemed it his time to…well, move on.”

  Where are we? Glancing around, I notice that I’m in a castle dungeon, like the one Anna and I pretend to play in. My heart leaps thinking about her and the boys. I miss my friends. Afraid to interrupt the mean lady, I sob into the darkness, “I want to go home.”

  A howling from the shadows interrupts the woman’s rant. “Breesan, baby, where are you?” Dust particles dance in a small sliver of light that shines from the long-ago boarded window, revealing an arm stretching out toward me. It’s blood-soaked, and I can see a tattered American flag tattooed on it. That’s my daddy’s tattoo. I want to call out and beg him to save me, but the words lodge in my throat from terror. Chains keep his hand from touching me and even though I want to crawl to him, I remain completely still for fear of the woman hitting me again. I don’t know why she did it before, but my cheek is swelling and stings from her first strike after she called me a pathetic bug.

  “You are a fucking monster,” Daddy’s voice roars louder from the shadow, causing me to jump, and I stifle a scream with my hand over my mouth. “I don’t care what you do to me, but if you hurt my daughter, I swear to fucking God, when I break out of this hellhole I will kill you!” The mean woman only laughs. “You bitch,” His voice is growing weak, “Who the hell are you and what do you want? Why can’t I see you? What did you do to me?”

  “Daddy,” I whisper too softly for anyone to hear.

  Deep, nauseating fear consumes my
body and a small shiver moving through me leads to body-racking convulsions. My bleeding knees make it hurt to move, but I must get a closer look. My hands and legs scrape over the cold, dirt-covered floor until finally, closer into the shadows, I see him. He is here. “Daddy,” I blurt through a sad mumble.

  “Baby,” He stretches against the cuffs digging into his wrists, causing blood to stream down his forearm. “I will get you back. No matter…” He coughs and jerks his hand away, grabbing his throat. “What did you do to me?” he groans then falls onto the floor paralyzed. His darkening eyes hold me in place as a single tear slips free, crosses over the bridge of his nose and streaks down the other side of his face.

  I snap open my eyes, pulling out of the thick haze cloaking my brain, and realize that I’ve been having a nightmare. Julia hovers over me in the school nurse’s office. “What is wrong with her?” she hisses at the worried-looking nurse, who is holding the back of her hand tenderly against my forehead.

  “I don’t really know, Mrs. Maxwell,” she answers, narrowing suspicious eyes on my stepmother. “Breesan was found passed out in the hallway in front of the middle school girl’s bathroom. Allegedly, no one was around to see what happened. She was unconscious until moments before you walked in. Suddenly she just started whimpering and repeating the word ‘Mars’.” The nurse glances down at me with a sweet smile curving her wrinkled-covered lips and asks, “Sweetie, would you like to tell me what happened?”

  “No!” Julia’s long, skinny fingers wrap over the nurse’s shoulder, pushing her away. She stares down at me, lying helplessly on a small cot. “I’m taking her home this instant, and she will see her doctor tomorrow. If my…stepdaughter,” she forces the word through gritted teeth, pretending that she actually cares about me, “can just pass out in this school and go unnoticed for an hour, then I’m removing her from attendance. You can bet that the board will hear about this insufferable incident. Now, move out of my way. Bug…Breesan, get up!” Obeying her, I lift my still-woozy head off the pillow while Julia grips her cold hand around my upper arm, digging her fingernails into the tender flesh underneath.

  “Ouch,” I cry, scooting off the small cot as quickly as possible.

  She roughly drops her hold on me, and I sway a bit from the force of her release. “Let’s go,” she directs, her high heels clicking on the hard tiles as she storms out of the room.

  “Breesan, honey, are you going to be okay?” The nurse runs a warm hand over my short hair. Her light-green eyes, filled with concern, watch me like a wounded animal. I nod my head slowly, careful not to stir up the dizziness again, and fast-walk to catch up with my evil stepmother.

  Once inside the car, Julia faces me with a look of unleashed bitterness. “What did you say back there?” The words are no more than a growl, warning and severe.

  “I don’t know, Julia,” I fib through trembling lips, knowing that she won’t accept this pathetic excuse of an answer.

  Seething, her chest rises and falls wildly. “What is Mars, Bug?”

  I pause and swallow hard, not wanting to answer her because she will just get madder if I tell her that I remember seeing her with my dad in that terrible place. I remember everything about the night when I was a child, and she took me to see him locked inside the Renaissance castle. But the reason she took me to see him wasn’t because she loved me and thought I needed him. It was so she could see that other man. My dad was hurt, chained to a wall, and she didn’t even look his way once. She and those people did something bad to him. I need to find him so that I can save him and get him some help before they kill him, if they haven’t already.

  “Okay,” pulling a scary smile across her wine-red painted lips, she offers, “How about we get some food? Would you like a burger or pizza for dinner tonight?”

  “What?” I stare with my mouth hanging open, completely shocked that she would consider letting me eat junk food. Who is this person?

  “Manners, Breesan, I asked you a question,” she snarls before forcing another fake smile, pressing for my answer.

  “Oh, yes, I’m sorry, Julia.” Pulling out of my stupor, I glance down at my hands, knotting in my lap, clear the thick fear from my throat and mutter, “I would like a burger. Thank you.” I can’t remember the last time she bought me anything–even something as simple as food. She buys things for our house, but never anything that she knows would make me happy.

  “Good,” she trills, pulling out of the school parking lot. We hit the drive-thru line at Milo’s where she only orders for me.

  “Don’t touch it until we get home,” she instructs, dropping the hot bag onto my lap.

  Oh man, the heavenly aroma of onions, pickles and Milo’s sauce fills the interior of the car instantaneously, and it smells so good that I moan miserably. Waiting to get home will be a nightmare. Thank goodness it isn’t that far.

  Walking into the house, Julia starts toward the kitchen and I follow closely, ready to dig in. She yanks my food and tea out of my hands before ordering me upstairs to wash up and put my school stuff away. I race up the stairs, darting around the bathroom like a mad woman on a mission, so fast that I’m back in the kitchen with her just as she pours my tea into a tall, clear glass.

  “Eat up, Bug,” she orders, pushing a plate toward me with my food neatly arranged on it. “Here’s your tea; enjoy.” She leaves me to eat in peace and that’s exactly how it feels to be alone again–peaceful.

  I pop my straw into the glass and sprinkle in the Sweet ’n Low after fishing out the slippery slice of lemon. “Yuck!” Eating slowly, I savor each bite of the juicy burger, wiping away the sauce as it oozes down my chin. The fries are still warm, and oh, so delicious, I muse contentedly. Appreciating this rare moment of bliss, I lick the seasoning off before I crunch down each one.

  “Bug,” Julia calls from the hallway.

  “Yes, ma’am?” I mumble after shoving in the last bite and rinsing it down with a large slurp of tea quickly, afraid that she’ll realize that she actually did something nice for me and take it back.

  Julia steps into the room holding my suitcase. Still chewing, I glance from it to her and then back again before I inquire, “What’s the deal with my bag?” She narrows her eyes at me for talking with my mouth full.

  “How are you feeling?” she prods, placing the bag on the floor at the doorway and propping it against the wall before joining me in the dining room.

  “I’m fine,” I tinge, confused with this whole scene. Pointing at my suitcase, I politely ask, “Are you going to tell me why you have that?”

  “Are you lightheaded at all or feeling sick to your stomach?” She deflects my questions with more of her weird inquiries about my health. She doesn’t care about me. Suddenly nervous, I peel my eyes away from the suitcase and glance up at her, looming at the opposite end of the table. Once again, she appears irritated, with her arms crossing over her chest and a painted nail tapping the corner of her elbow. I shake my head, responding to her last question, and she frowns.

  “Finish your drink and clean up your mess,” she orders, taking a seat at the table. “Then we’ll talk about this Mars nonsense.” She watches me for any signs giving away the fact that I know exactly what Mars means. At first, I freeze with trepidation, but then I do exactly as she demands before she yells. I sit back down at my end of the table. She glares at me expectantly. “Well, speak!”

  “I…I don’t really know what to tell you…It was nothing,” I stammer, shrugging my shoulders and avoiding her bitter look. “I guess I passed out…and had some goofy dream.” I hope that convinces her that I don’t know the truth about how deeply vile she really is.

  “Don’t shrug!” she gripes, rubbing her palm into the center of her forehead while squeezing her eyes closed and mumbling something unintelligible. Her hand slams down hard on the table and I jump at the force of it. “You will tell me everything–NOW! Otherwise, you won’t leave this table. Am I making myself clear?” She’s daring me to defy her.

&nbs
p; Knowing she means every single word, I rush my answer through a shaky voice. “Miller Adams was talking crap about me in the girl’s bathroom and I passed out. There, are you happy?” That little bit of attitude could come back to bite me in the ass–literally. Although she has never struck me, the anger swelling in her eyes threatens that physical abuse is imminent.

  “What did that little wench say? Do not leave out anything.”

  “God, Julia,” I whine softly, feeling a strange tingle move through my blood, muscles and bones. “Why does it matter? I don’t care what that stupid girl says and…I don’t believe her.”

  “Bug,” she warns, squeezing her hand into a tight ball, lying on top of the table.

  “Fine,” I dramatically plop both hands on the table in front of me and stare harshly back at her wanting this whole ugly scene over with, once and for all. I’m not sure where all of this attitude – or insanity – is coming from. Usually, I relinquish and submit fully when she watches me so fiercely. “Miller said that I killed my mother and that my dad didn’t get taken…” I close my eyes, pricking with welling tears, regain control over my quivering chin and then sigh before whispering, “She said dad left us.”

  Weak and very sleepy all of a sudden, I cross my arms, placing them on the table and laying my heavy head on them. A huge yawn escapes my mouth and I apologize before she yells at me about my manners again. “Forgive me.” She relaxes a bit, leaning back in her chair.

  “Very well, now tell me about Mars,” Julia demands, relentless on knowing if I slipped up and told about the horrible thing she has done.

  “Yes, ma’am,” I nod, rubbing my chin propped against the top of my folded hands. “It was just a dream–something about my dad being taken by a mean woman,” I pause and she glowers, stiffening in her seat. “You were there with some other guy. I…I thought that maybe we were inside the Renaissance Castle, but you’ve never once let me go there.” I sigh. “That’s how I know it couldn’t be real.” She shifts in her seat when I mention this, like she’s uncomfortable, so I ask, “Have I ever been to the castle?” She doesn’t answer, but the creepy smile stretching across her lips reveals her answer. It wasn’t really a dream! Fighting against another obnoxious yawn, I beg, “Do you know if my dad is still alive, Julia?”